Life Unplugged - 8

The interplay of emotions

How many of you have started a new activity (such as a personal project or exercise routine) with a burst of enthusiasm, only to see that initial momentum evaporates? This often leads to depression and causes us to give up prematurely. I’ve experienced this letdown dozens of times in my life. But fortunately, with a bit of thought and reflection one can turn this negative emotion around. The key to harnessing your emotions is understanding them. The natural pattern of our emotion is peaks and valleys. When we start a new project we’re filled with tremendous optimism. All we can think about is the expected benefits, and since we haven’t started yet, we aren’t aware of the difficulties involved. This natural high causes a surge of mental and physical activity. The peak is a great thing because the energy boost sets off the project. You feel like nothing can stop you. Then starts the drama of our bi**h(Life) with minor obstacles and snowballs into a thunderstorm of negativity.

The downside of this surge of energy is that it inevitably ends. Exerting large amounts of quick energy doses, the initial optimism wears off. Confidence takes a beating and motivation goes for a toss. The combination of fatigue, scant results, and an awareness of impending adversity makes us want to give up and motivation goes for a down ride. Emotions, by nature, lose their power when we understand them. Prove this to yourself. Next time you get angry, take a moment. Step back and reflect upon yourself. Look at the causes. Are you tired, burned out, disappointed by the results? Are these feelings justified, or are they a by product of a low point in the emotional spectrum?

To overcome this prepare yourself for a letdown. Know your emotions, understand your emotional pattern and be prepared for an initial emotional peak to pass. Mostly, optimism would give way to depression. In the back of your mind, foresee the impending motivational battle and the faith crisis in your ability to take it to end.

The passing of an emotional peak is a blessing in disguise because it allows you to revaluate your plans from a fresh perspective. At first you are blinded by your own optimism. Such motivation crisis drives away the Dhritarashtra from you and makes you look around 360. Guys, either get down on ourselves and give up, or use these negative emotions to discover your faults and rectify them. Revisit all the negatives thoughts you had and apply them to this crisis. Be realistic about your abilities and expectations. Emotional valleys bring us back to reality. Without them we’d be raving lunatics with unlimited self-confidence.

One reason people digress is that they became too concerned with the financial aspect and lose the theme of life. Know your passion and realign your motivation with it. It won’t be a cakewalk but your goals will be the carrot to take you forward and I bet nothing beats the joy of meeting your set goals and basking in the shining drops of sweat.

In truth, sometimes giving up is the right decision. If you started doing something for the wrong reasons you’ll likely lose your motivation. This is a good thing. It allows us to see what really motivates us. In these cases, the best choice is to move on to a new endeavour. Don’t fight self doubt, use it for your benefit.

We generally accept our emotions as beyond our control. They are powerful and mysterious and appear quite irrational. But if we contemplate our emotions, if we explore the inner workings of our minds, we find that like all things, emotions obey the law of cause and effect. Armed with this knowledge, we can continue to allow our emotions to dominate our lives, or we can use them to our benefit.

What I learnt in the last few days is learning the hard way embosses the lesson for the lifetime. But to be on the fast track one needs to look around and learn from others’ emotional breakdowns, others’ goof-ups. Even sharing your stupidity sometimes help. You can get new angles which you haven’t even thought of. What life has taught me is never be shy in sharing the knowledge.

The Unplugger takes your leave with some lines…

Nothing quenches thirst like water, nothing is as refreshing as sleep, nothing is as comforting as a friend’s shoulder in a sob and nothing is as divine as nap in the mother’s lap. Guys it’s family time for me. Will be meeting 40 cousins, (both sides) in a span of one week. This is from Tony. “When it rains, it pours.” :)